Endings and Beginnings

Contributed by: Ginger Rothhaas, Compassion Fix

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 I moved my son into his Freshman year of college this week. He is excited and nervous…and all of the feelings…and so am I. This transition has me thinking about endings and beginnings in our lives. 

The endings of things familiar and the beginnings of things unknown. 

Ah, the constant cycle of living. A phenomenon that we all know so well. Change is an unavoidable shared human experience. 

We know intellectually, that if life was always the same with no change, it would actually get pretty boring pretty quickly. Change brings growth and expansion. Trying new things keeps our brain stimulated and healthy. It is necessary for our survival.

Everything in nature is hard-wired to grow. When a plant or animal doesn’t have space to expand, it eventually withers away. We are made for change, but humans are a species that resists its own growth. Our fears get in the way of our growth and the growth of others. Fear prohibits growth. 

Remember from neuroscience, we know that the human brain will never welcome change. Our brain’s job is to keep us safe, so it will choose predictable, boring, and familiar every time. We have to lead our brain into welcoming change, but it resists us because of its default setting (and tantrum) of “keep it the same!” 

We can help our brain open to expansion by stretching ourselves to notice beginnings, not just endings. Gains, not just losses. Possibilities, not just limitations. Starts, not just finishes. 

What feels like it is ending for you right now? Because of that, what might begin? 

We likely have to get creative and stretch our optimism muscles a bit. But, when I have this conversation with a client, we can always find something that begins when something ends. Sometimes it takes some time for us to find it, but the sunset always means a new day is coming in some form. 

As author Elizabeth Gilbert has said, “it’s time for something that was beautiful to turn into something else that is beautiful.” 

What beautiful thing lies ahead for you or someone you love? 

Here’s to your beautiful days ahead for all of us.

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Ginger Rothhaas, MBA, MDiv. is a seminary trained compassion coach who teaches about compassion at the intersection of neuroscience and spirituality. She is the founder of Compassion Fix Coaching, and she has written a book of mental health practices titled Being Human: 150 Practices to Make it Easier. She lives in Kansas City with her husband, their two teenage children, and two very enthusiastic dogs.

You can find Ginger at:

Websites: gingerrothhaas.com, compassionfix.com

Facebook and Instagram: @gingerrothhaas and @compassionfix

New Book: Being Human